Much Needed Alone Time

After spending the morning in bed I finally felt a little better.  I spent some time with the husband in the morning and in the afternoon did a quick photo shoot for a friend's blog.

I went and ran some errands and spent the afternoon all by myself.  I'm so weird, I was in the car realizing that there was no one I could call or hang out with and it made me sad.  In the next moment I was very happy that I had no one to call, no pressure to spend time with anyone.  I had the whole day to myself.

I did some yoga and watched some TV, and now I'm going to go work on my resume for that job.

International Terminal

My friend booked a late night flight to his hometown, and was going to stay for a long period of time.  So I went to help him back up his stuff and throw out everything else.  I have to mail him a juicer and some other things in a box when I get back to work on Tuesday.

I'm taking tomorrow off from work.  It's been a long enough week for a short one.  I hope I get another job in my hometown soon.

Alone Time

I took my sister to the airport today, and was super jealous of her.  I wanted to go with her so bad.

I feel like this town drains on me too, my energy has been sapped since I got back.  I can barely make it to work and back directly to my bed.

I need some alone time.

Get me out of here!

I have a massive case of senioritis with this town.  I could barely get through work today because I just don't want to be there anymore.  I've got to keep it together.  A friend forwarded on a job I need to update my resume for.

First Day Back

It was my first day back to work after over a week.  I really didn't want to come back, but as soon as I hit the city limits the day before yesterday I felt like I shouldn't be leaving.

It's just that easy to fall back into old habits and let your insecurities take over.  As I walked in and started "walking the walk" of my job, I realized all over again how different the place is in regards to everywhere else.  What if I don't know how to act in any other job?  What if I'm ruined for an "adult" job?

I told my sister this today, and she said it would be like riding a bike once I got another job.  I'd just remember everything I was supposed to do and be an adult.

I really hope she's right.  I'm going to go work on my resume.

Memorial Birthdays

It was my sister's birthday today.  She turned 26, the start of the not-so-fun birthdays.  We went and did some touristy things and also went to a BBQ earlier in the day.

She didn't want a cupcake or a real cake to mark the occasion.  I didn't get a cake for my birthday this year either.  I feel like as we grow older, that is the only nice thing left about getting older.

I'm Gone, Girl.

We drove home, and listened to more Gone Girl audio book.   I am so tired, but glad to be in my own bed.

Sushi and Drinking

My hometown friend A had was doing stand up tonight, so we went out to lunch with my mom before hand and did some work around the house.

Her stand up was excellent, and we went out for drinks afterward and caught up with some other friends.  I feel like I got a taste of what life would be like again when we moved back.

I don't want to leave.

State Pride

After a full day of helping my mom around the house, we went out to dinner and drinks with my friend A.  We went completely local and went out to drink at a Tavern named after the year we became a state.  The drinks were cheap, the times were fun.

We also went out to an awesome museum in the afternoon, and I really felt like it was a great day.

Working in a Coal Mine

It was all mom day with a quick trip to the museum. We need to get this stuff done for her now. 

Ending on a High Note

The day started off rough with hubby getting sick at breakfast and just wanting to go back to the house. We did go home, but then he did get better. We then went out shopping and picked him up a hoodie and then went home to clean out my moms fridge. 

Both my parents are hoarders to a degree, so we threw out around 4-5 kitchen sized trash bags of expired food. The winner was a bottle of salad dressing that expired in 2004.  The rest ranged from 2007-2012.

We headed out to meet hubby's brother and wife for dinner and drinks. It was really nice catching up and it ended of day on a high note rather than the situation we started with. 

Friendworking

We moved onto my home town around 8:00 PM after visiting with some friends in hubby's town. Nothing special, just catching up and letting everyone know we were trying to move back up.

Small Town Life

It was a slow day of visiting friends and family at the hubby's hometown.  I love the small town feel and wouldn't even mind living here someday. We just need jobs. 

Drive Fast, Take Chances

I was startled out of bed this morning by what sounded like the smoke alarm.  I launched out of bed to find out what was on fire, and it turns out it was an old alarm clock that she'd pulled in and it went crazy.  I went back to bed, and got up later than expected to start out on our trip.

We made an 8.5 hour drive in 7.5 hours.  We even took the long way, which was pretty impressive.  We started listening to an audio book to pass the time on the last stretch of road.  We picked "Gone Girl" by Gillian Flynn, and listened to a few chapters.

So far I like it, it seems like an interesting start.  Hubby is less interested in the story.  I see parallels in our marriage so far; they are celebrating 5 years, we are celebrating 10 this year.  From what I hear, that is where the similarities are going to end.

Hipster Fail part 2

I left work halfway through my shift so I could hit the Toms sale again and pack for the trip.

I picked up my sister and we headed over the Toms sale again.  I was hoping it was going to be full of different stuff, but all the same stuff was there.  Sigh, I guess I might bite the bullet and buy the full price ones on their site.

Afterwards we went to R's mom's house to visit him and his mom's dog.  It's a cute little wiener dog who likes sticking her face in your face.

Then I went home to pack for the weeklong trip back home that we start tomorrow!

Cinderella Status

Literally all I did today was go to work, come home, and do laundry for our trip home.  I'm lazy.

Hipster Fail

I didn't have to go into work today, but did have to go to another company wide 4 hour meeting.  There were some interesting speakers, but mostly I wanted it to just be over so I could go to the Tom's Warehouse sale.

They have these sales once a year where they still do 1 for 1, but they are also on mega sale, a little more than half price.  I didn't buy as much as I should have last year, I didn't expect to like them so much.  I know, I'm a big hipster.

Sadly, when I got there my size was all but sold out.  They replenish throughout the sale, so I guess I'll come back later!

Cause You Had A Bad Day

I was pretty cranky all day, then everyone was home when I got home. So I said screw this day and went to bed. 

Crampasaurus

Day 4 of cramps.  I just want to sleep.

I did come up with a story idea this weekend that I added to my Google Drive so I can work on it anywhere I go.   I'm looking forward to following through with this idea and hopefully getting it published someday!

Medical Day

I slept in because I was up at 6AM yesterday due to the wind.  Around 11 I realized I had to go get a blood test for Dr. Hitler.  The place I go closes at noon for lunch, so I launched into the shower and got there with wet hair, still cramping up in my stomach. 

Since I'm unable to get a liver specialist to call me back, I've decided to try not to drink booze anymore, and not take any more pain medication.  I hope this will help out as much as possible, and as I lose weight my liver will get better too.

I went out to Sushi with the hubby and then went to the regular doctor's appointment.  She said my liver looked better, and I had lost a few pounds since February.  I'll take it!  However, then she said that...and I'm paraphrasing here...I have a touch of Epstein-Barr.

Apparently there are around 4 antibodies to test, and I'm positive on just one of them.  She thinks I got a dormant version on the virus when I was a kid, and it just decided to come out and play.  The only thing to do is to sleep it off, so I guess that is what I did yesterday.

I'm again glad to see I'm not crazy being so tired lately.  I just don't know when that light at the end of the tunnel is going to appear.

A Day Late and a Cramp Short

It was so windy that we spent our mother's day in the house, opening the front door only to get the pizza from the delivery boy.

I didn't get out of my PJ's the whole day, and neither did my sister.  To be fair, my Vodka party started the day before so I was just cramping and not happy.

Even though we did almost nothing, it was a good day.  I really needed a day to rest.

Gatsby's Special Features

I did end up going to the picnic and had an okay time.  My sister and I went out a little afterwards, but it was too crowded to really do anything due to the weekend.  We ended up going to Five Guys and just taking it home.

My sister went to bed and I popped in The Great Gatsby's special features disc.  There was this great special about F. Scott Fitzgerald and his love affair with NYC.  I really wish that I could settle on all the things I'd like to do if I went to NYC and start planning a trip.

I've been told that Fall is the best time to go.  From there, all the things I want to do range from Cloisters to the Circle Line.  There really is so much that I want to do, I would have to be there for a week.

****

I got a job offer that I almost wish I had taken the other day, mostly because I'm getting more and more scared about moving back home.  Hubby and I are driving back home for a week to move some things, and it's making me nervous.  One, because we haven't packed up anything yet.  Two, because I'm afraid of moving back and having it not be the same.  I'm afraid of not finding a job, of hubby not bothering to find a job in time, and everything just going straight to hell. 

It's MY Friday too

I woke up this morning knowing it was my Friday, and yet I wished it was my Saturday.  Sometimes you just want more than you get. 

There is a picnic for my work tomorrow, which is why I don't have to go in tomorrow, making it my Friday.  This whole week went by so fast, and yet so very painfully slow.  Nothing of interest really happened, and I just looked forward to ending my week early.  I even considered not going to the picnic at all.

As it stands now, I'm just happy that sleeping in tomorrow is something I can do.

Alone Time is a Precious Commodity

 I was looking forward to some "Secret Single Behavior" when I  got home from work today, as both the sister and the hubby were due to be out all night.

I took my time getting home, even drove a co-worker home in the process because I knew I had some time.  I was looking forward to it.

Of course, when I look forward to something, it never quite comes to pass.  Both of them were home before I even got off work.  I went out to dinner with hubby, which was nice.  But I do miss my alone time lately.

Another Marshmallow

My co-worker friend finally brought in the last of my Veronica Mars DVDs that I asked him to convert to digital.  For some reason I had started backwards with him, so he was bringing me back season 1.  He had just finished Sons of Anarchy or some such show, so he ended up loading it on his laptop and started watching with me.

I really do like that he's getting into it and watching episode two.  I'm getting another Marshmallow into the show!

Nothing a B&C Burrito Can't Fix

I got a wicked case of the cramps as I was leaving work today.  The uncomfortableness lead me to getting a bean and cheese burrito on the way home, and I'm sorry to say I ate the whole thing.

Some days just don't end up in an up position.  I'm heading to bed early.

Cinco De Carbo

It was another lazy day as we didn't really get out of bed until noon.  Then we decided we would make some Mexican food for dinner and go out for Italian for lunch.

For the first time in a year, I had full on carbs for a meal and had pasta puttanesca.  Which is literally whore pasta, but it's delicious. I've missed pasta so much on this diet, it was worth it to splurge one day.  There was enough left over for lunch tomorrow, so I should be on cloud 9 again for lunch tomorrow.

We went to go grocery shopping for dinner and then by the time we came home we decided a nap first.  Now at 10 PM we are just starting on this dinner.  Better late than never?

No Time for Lazy Sundays

We were up early to get ready for brunch at 11.  It was a bunch of work friends, and so my poor hubby was bored and was not having fun.  I told him we would do it without him from now on, as we won't be on the same schedule for much longer.  I really tried to not talk about work, but our job sort of takes over our lives.

My middle of the day plans (photography gig-ish) got canceled, so naps were had instead.  I then went for drinks with G.  I really feel like the whole thing is behind us, and we actually ended up talking for 3 hours and shutting down the restaurant.  I really felt like something was missing lately, and I really do feel like it was this friendship.

He suggested I go work for his company, which pays less but has a location in my hometown.  I'm very conflicted, as it would be nice to have a job when I got home.  However, it's a teenager type job that will never pay enough for me to live off of.

Summertime Saturday Sadness

Okay, I wasn't that sad today.  I was just very very very tired.  I had twice as much caffeine as I usually do to no avail.

The whole rest of the day was just a tired blur.

Happy Tears

I got up this morning to a notification from 23andMe saying my results were ready.  I had been waiting months for this day to arrive, and was excited to know where I had come from.

I was 99.7% European, which wasn't a surprise.  I am 45% Ashkenazi, which means I sure wasn't adopted!  For some reason that made me feel better though, to know that I'm Jewish in my DNA, if not in practice with religion.  It made me feel better, and also made me think of that time I walked out of Hebrew school when I was 7.  I wasn't able to grasp Hebrew and had asked if it was possible I could just continue on in school without it.  The Rabbi basically yelled at me and told me that I wasn't a real Jew if I didn't know Hebrew.  I left and never came back to that Temple.  I don't remember his name, but fuck you sir.  You can't take being Jewish away from me.  It's in my DNA.

I'm also 17% British and Irish (Yah, that much more celebrating on St. P's Day), and 5.4% French and German.  I sent the results to my mom and she said "Where did you get that?  It's wrong, my whole family was from Germany."  Looks like they lied Mom, I'm more Irish than I am German.  Cue the "Not that there is anything wrong with that" from Seinfeld line.

Then I got on the scale and I had lost a pound, so the day was starting out right.  I had lunch with my sister and her boyfriend, and then rode out the rest of the day in good spirits.

I came home and checked the mail and I had gotten my Kickstarter DVD/Blu Ray copy of Veronica Mars in the mail.  I popped it in and watched the making of, and it literally brought me to tears.  I didn't realize how awesome that whole experience had been until just today.  They were very happy tears, and I'd gladly do it again for another movie.

It was G's birthday today, and I had debated if I should text him Happy Birthday or not.  In the end I did send a "Happy Birthday Dude, I hope it's been a good one" late into the night.  I got a text back "Thank you!  Sorry I missed yours in March.  I had just started a new job and my head was a mess, I truly apologize!  I hope we can connect soon and laugh over some drinks and I can be given an opportunity to apologize in person to you.  Your text is a great present today :)"  I told him that it would be great to get together, and we might meet up on Sunday.  I again started crying when I realized how much I had blocked out how great our friendship had been.  What he still did was wrong, and I still can never trust him as much as I did before.  But we can still be friends, and I'm glad that we are giving it another chance.

There were a lot of tears for such a happy day, but the tears were a very big release.  I feel so much better than I felt yesterday when everyone else's misery was weighing heavy on me. Things are looking up!

I Second That Emotion

I got denied the position I went for at work today.  I didn't expect to get it, so it was no big deal.  Then I heard that someone else got denied as well, and they were taking it pretty hard.  I've known him for years, and he's been turned down for almost everything he's gone for.  That kind of rejection is gonna get to you after awhile.  I feel really bad for him, and I hope our talk made him feel a little better.

Then I heard another person was hurt over not getting the position.  Then another friend posted a blog that was burned by some anons and she took it down hours later.  A lot of hurt feelings today, and it really brought me down to see them brought down.

The cheesecake was good, I'm glad we didn't screw it up.  Finishing up the night by watching Frozen with the sister and the boyfriend.