Top Ten TV Boyfriends, Part I

V boyfriends... they are the boyfriends that don't exist, yet you wish they did. Here are mine! Jamie actually told how the relationship would end. I'm going one step beyond and making up a cute story for how we met. Yes, I have to much time on my hands.

Here are the first five!

Doogie Howser, M.D.

How we'd meet: I'd get a piece of food stuck in my throat and he'd perform the Heimlich on me. He'd get Florence Nightingale Syndrome and we'd start dating. (By the way, in this fantasy I'm the same age he was in the series. Don't get any gross ideas!)

How the relationship would end: I'd leave him for Vinnie. What can I say, sense of humor and a healthy sex drive always wins out in the end.





Aidan Shaw from Sex and the City

How we'd meet: I'd be writing a piece on unique furniture stores and come upon his. After a innuendo-infused interview he'd invite me to dinner.

How it would end: I'd want him to try and go global with his talent, and he'd be content to just stay in New York and make enough to live comfortably.



Jordan Catalano from My So-Called Life

How we'd meet: I'd finally get up the courage to talk to him in the hallway and I'd say "Um, did you drop your pencil in Bio last period?" and he'd say "uhhh....I don't think I, like, own a pencil." Two periods later we'd be making out in the boiler room.

How it would end: I'd be disheartened that he didn't care about graduating, and all I got out of him were a few driving lessons and peer pressure to have sex with him. I'd go after the good guy next, thinking I had cured myself of bad boys forever. I'd be wrong.



Logan Echolls from Veronica Mars

How we'd meet: In class, on my first day. I'd give a snarkier answer to the teacher before he could do it. I'd get in trouble, and he'd go out of his way to get in trouble too, just to spend detention with me. Sure, he's an obligatory psychotic jackass...but man is he sexy and quick with the wit.

How it would end: After I suspected he was cheating on me. A guy can only go to "Mexico" to go "surfing with the guys" so many times, ya know?



Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

How we'd meet: After seeing that Buffy is a self-centered bitch that's only using him for sex, he'll be heartbroken...and turn to me. I'll console him right into the sack.

How it would end: After he gets to clingy, I stake him in his sleep. I'll do anything to get out of a rough breakup.